As slow as a snail’s funeralBy Jamie Archer / SimilesSynonyms: Crawling, creeping, lazy, idle, lethargic, sluggishTags: Funeral Funny Slow SnailMore similes for FunnyAs excited as a blind lesbian in a fish shopDry as a dead dingo’s dongerAs stylish as a taxman’s trousersAs stiff as a frozen fishLooser than a yoga master on valiumAs rare as a fat postmanSee all "Funny" similes →